Sunday Surf - April 16

This week for Sunday Surf I have posted my favorite blog entries for the Twelfth Carnival of Feminist . Parenting. Check them out!

The hypocrite in the room: Views on female sexuality
What is it about female beauty standards that we are so horrified when children copy them? Is it because we fear they will ‘grow up too soon’, or because we know that those beauty standards are harmful by nature, no matter one’s age?

When fighting rape culture means changing birth culture
"The pathologising of women’s pregnant and birthing bodies and the erasing of their bodily autonomy in a medical setting should be of concern to all feminists, not just those of us who want to have or have had children. Reproductive freedom extends beyond abortion rights — and fighting for it is fighting against sexual assault."

Another Doula Ban, Another Bad Birth Plan
"Because of concerns for increased risk to you or your baby, the doctors at KGA have made a thoughtful, unanimous decision not to allow doulas to participate in the birthing process. It has been our experience that they may serve to create a state of confusion and tension in the delivery room, which may compromise our ability to provide the safest delivery situation possible for you and your baby."

Is stay at home motherhood a class issue?
Middle class mummies get mocked for our pushiness and ponciness but we usually get the benefit of the doubt from authority figures, be it health visitors, teachers - or the media. Poorer mothers are negatively stereotyped from the start.

Fragments of Evolving Manhood: Do You Like Your Body 4 (More on the Expendability of the Foreskin)
"There is no way to predict what effect his circumcision will have on him, but that is not the question we ought to be asking ourselves. Rather, we ought to be asking why we as a culture so despise the body with which he was born that we need so radically and so painfully to alter it, and then we need to be asking if that is the kind of society we really want to be."

Got Milk? Part Two: A Dad’s View on Breastfeeding
"When I first met my wife, her boobs were mine. She wore special bras to make them look a certain way…….for me. She would wear lacy things on them to make them a sultry sight……..for me. When she took them out she was taking them out……for me.Then came the children.At that time both of our roles changed, as well they should."

Society is creepy (not breastfeeding)
"Breastfeeding may not be for everyone. But breastfeeding is not creepy. Our society is creepy for thinking that breastfeeding is creepy."

normalizing breastfeeding through solidarity…
"While the US pretends to be a progressive and educated society, we come up lacking when it comes to the basic needs of our young. This is clearly evident when the topic of breastfeeding comes up."

Where's Mom?
"Bad kids on planes: Where's mom?" asks CNN. As if we don't know. Mom is standing before the firing squad, their magazines loaded with blame and recriminations, awaiting her inevitable fate to the distant sound of gnashing teeth.Dad, on the other hand, is nowhere to be found. As usual."

Feminism Beyond the Veil
I can’t fault people for what they don’t know, but what I can do is push people to expand their thinking about pregnancy and birth. My message is one that is addressed to feminists and non-feminists alike: birth matters, women matter, families matter.

Cyberbullying not just for kids: moms get bullied too
A woman can never, never, never win. If she devotes herself entirely to her kids, she has no identity. If she tries to have a career at any point when her child also needs her, she's selfish. If her husband leaves her for someone prettier and younger, it's her fault for "letting herself go." If she takes time away from her family to exercise or go to school, she's cold. If she doesn't, she's lazy and eats bon bons all day.We. Can't. Win.

My classes must be over because this post is damn long.
I have relationships that don't have much to do with my kid, of course, but increasingly few. It seems to be the case that once you have a kid, and once you start a new portion of life with that kid, you really don't make the friends you used to in a way that doesn't involve the kid.

Yes, I am a feminist housewife
"I hate the word housewife. I hate the word homemaker. These words are so loaded with patriarchal bullshit that I can barely utter them in any seriousness, much less use them to describe myself or what I do. "

Why My Daughter Doesn’t Watch Disney Movies
Almost across the board, the Disney movies (at least those with people in them—I admit that I’ve seen very few of their animal-based animated films) hold up marriage, usually to someone completely inappropriate, as the holy grail. I remind you that these are films being marketed to children, and that the overwhelming message in the end is this: Be pretty and kind and good, and maybe someone who is wealthy and powerful will want you for his bride.